Finally...I have a 7 year old!

Hooray! Blake turned 7, last Thursday June 19th. I can't tell you how good it felt to have Blake turn 7. Honestly leading up to his Birthday I had been worried it would be difficult for me, to have Blake pass up Griffin's age. I wasn't sure how my emotions would be.
On Wednesday we had Blake's best friend Matthew stay over. I had pre-scheduled the day off, we had plans to take Syd to daycare and hit the pool! Grab the best chocolate cake from costco and Blake's favorite chinese food for dinner. Unfortunately, the day didn't go as planned, when poor little Sydney woke up with the stomach flu! She was throwing up like crazy.... more to follow, i have to go get Blake and drop him off at cubscout camp!

Operation Binky (aka Beaz)

Yes, Sydney is 2 and 3 months, and she still has a binky! She's obsessed, she loves it, she doesn't have it at school, only nap time, but the second she sees me "my beaz, I need my beaz". Originally I had said when she's 2 I'll take it away, two came, Blake said Mom no more Beaz, I said, it's okay...well it's okay has turned into 4 more months...and many more to come...unless.

Last night, I decided since I didn't have to work today and we are leaving for vacation soon, we didn't need the Binky anymore! How do we take it away? I had the idea to go to Build a Bear this morning. Last night I told Syd that it was her last night with her Beaz, i explained what we were going to do. Syd picked an animal, and we would put some Binkys in her bear. She acutally picked a very cute Bunny, armed with a bag of about 12 binkys, she handed the lady one she hates, the lady asked for more, slowly and Syd handed her another one, The lady put a Binky in each paw, in her tummy and in the bunnies head. I took the bag from her and she started crying ( I felt horrible) She wanted her Beaz back!! She hugged her Rabbit, and reluctantly move to the washing station. She left Buildabear screaming about her Beaz, she cried the entire car ride home, she went up into her room and cried. Later she came down, told me her Beaz was in her Rabbit and she was a Big Girl. We named the Bunny Binky, she can feel the Binkys in the bunny's paws and has been doing fabulous today!!! We swam all day, then had a neighborhood block party so she hasn't slept with out it yet...but she's doing great!! Hooray!! Next step potty training!!! But I'm waiting until after our vacation!

Walking is going great! I'm torn because I want to go to the berry patch tomorrow and it interfers with my walking, i've not missed one saturday in 6 weeks, so i'm not sure what i will do tomorrow. Berry picking and make up my walk tomorrow evening?? or walk in the morning and skip the patch.. We'll see I'm undecided..

Remembering ...

I’ll never forget the conversation I had with Griffin on December 27th 2004. We were admitting him to the hospital for what would be his final stay. I knew at this moment I had to tell him that “he was probably going to die” I said probably because I couldn’t concretely say when or how long and maybe, just maybe we could get that miracle.

Griffin’s initial response did not surprise me, “Mom, can’t we go to a different hospital, can’t we see a different doctor.” “Isn’t there any thing else, I don’t want to die” It broke my heart to tell him there was nothing left any doctor could do. That we had done everything possible but his cancer was too strong. Within minutes Griffin accepted his fate. It was then he told his favorite "Texas" Nurse Brad (he had many favorites in California!) to do him a favor, to make sure to tell everyone about a boy named Griffin, who was brave and strong who tried so hard to fight his bad guys.

It also breaks my heart to know that I am not alone on this journey, that each and every day Mother’s have to say “goodbye” to their children. We have to find a cure and that is why Team in Training is so important to me!

I truly believe we will find a cure to cancer one day. Team in Training has provided me such an incredible outlet. I can’t find the words to adequately express my gratitude for all the support I've received from my friends and family; Supporting not only me but all the families who are facing cancer. Together WE CAN and WE ARE making a difference. We will find a Cure! And "fight the bad guys".