Team in Training Season 2!

I'm so thrilled and excited to share that I have not only signed up for a second season of Team in Training, but signed up to be part of their leadership team. I will be serving as one of the mentor's for the summer season!

I had my first informational meeting last Thursday, and it was amazing! I really feel such a strong bond towards TNT! It is definetly what I am mean't to be doing. I loved sharing my story about Griffin and how much TNT means to me. I loved meeting the new people.

I can't wait for this season to officially start. I've started getting off my lazy but and walking again. I'll be glad to have that routine back, happy to inspire my teammates, but most importantly be thrilled to raise money for Blood cancers, so that one day, mom's like me won't have to lose their child to cancer!
-Mo

So Happy it's Jan 5th

So, we made it through another year. I realize it's sad, but I'm thrilled to have Jan 4th over with and that I don't have to deal with it for another 364 days!

The last week has been so difficult for me. I cried and I cried, until I couldn't cry any more, I was moody and irritable. The anticipation of the actual day is definately much worse for me than the actual day.

This weekend, was good. Saturday we knew the weather was going to be wonderful, so we spent the day at the zoo. It was close to 80, the kids playing in the water. We had a great time. Our babysitter Ms. Jennifer came to our house with 75 red helium balloons!! It was amazingly sweet for her to bring so many balloons. It's been our tradition to send red Balloons to Griffin, normally just a few, not 75! But 75! Wow that was so exciting (she made me cry!) We wrote notes to Griff and sent the Balloons to Heaven. Then Barry and I went out to dinner to the Cheesecake factory, it was nice to have time to sit and talk. (Outside, in shortsleeves, in Jan and yes it was 80 degrees) Today we are having ice storms (Texas weather is crazy).

Yesterday, Griffin's Happy Heaven Day, we ate Eggo Waffles for breakfast and watched Griffin's video. It was hard to watch, but I was so glad to hear his voice, gosh I miss him. I wanted to just get it over with (if that makes sense) and get all the crying done.

After the video, we went to the Science Place. We love the science museum. So did Griffin. It was a nice family day.

When we got home, the kids and I made my mom's famous checkerboard cake (my first time ever making it) I ran into a few snags, but it was delicious! And my kitchen is still a mess, i was too tired last night.

All in all, it was a day well spent, remembering my amazing boy. Griff-I love you always and forever.

Distracted

It was 4 years ago this week that we admitted Griffin to the hospital for the last time. I am trying to focus, yet find myself so distracted. Suprisingly I made it through Christmas with out crying. I wasn't until the 27th where i lost my mind, I was so consumed with emotions. I cried and cried. Yesterday, I cried. I even cried at work today. I am just ready for Jan 4th to be here and over. Ready for that 4 year mark to come and be gone. The problem, is that I just miss him. I miss being Griffin's mom. I miss his laugh, his toothless grin, him asking for eggo waffles 4 times a day. I miss it all.

13.1 miles I did it!

Halloween Update

So, I'm going to try to be better about Blogging. I can't believe it's Halloween. Sydney is Alice in Wonderland, she loves absoutely perfect as Alice. And if you call her Alice (while in costume) she quickly correct you, "No not Alice, Alice in Wonderland!" Sometimes I just look at her and can't believe she's my girl. Blake has 2 costumes depending on his mood. He recently pick up a gold/black ninja costume with an awesome ninja sword (we lost the sword at the Boo at the Zoo). Also, he has his zombie doctor costume from last year (we couldn't seem to find the doctor coat, so it's bacially scrubs (with guts and blood) plus we put blood in his hair and on his face! It's pretty cool.

The kids have already had Halloween overload! (The story of my life...trying to plan as many events as humanly possible) We've been to the Arboretum Pumpkin patch 3 times! We went to the YMCA halloween party, Trick or Treating at the Arboretum, Trick or Treating at the Heard Museum with the Dinosaurs (that was awesome!), the Boo at the Zoo, our grief group party and all before Halloween!

Today, is actually Halloween, the kids ate donuts for breakfast (per my promise to my grandma to feed them donuts and hotdogs today (like we used to)) I'm picking them up early and bringing them back to my office to trick or treat and then we will trick or treat around the neighborhood!!

I'm sure we'll have candy for months!

I'm in final count down for the marathon, I'll update on that later. I have a big Pasta Party tomorrow night, Barry and I stay in the hotel, And the kids will come meet us to cheer me on Sunday morning. Be thinking of me!
-Mo

Race Day Jitters!!!

Okay, so I keep on telling myself NOT to freak out. I spent a couple days last week crying about the marathon. Come to find out, it is very normal, especially for your first race. The true problem I am having is....TIME...I have no doubt that I can walk 13.1 miles (honestly it's not THAT far). The problem comes that the race has a 4 hour time limit (granted my coach checked and said not to worry that people finished later then that last year) Anyways, my freak out comes that the whole season, i've been walking a 20 mile (can't seem to get my legs to go faster)so, that means assuming I can keep up the pace, I can walk 12 miles in 4 hours, not 13.1!!!! SUCKS!!! I'm not an athlete, I'm not walking for my chip timing, I do however, want to finish, before they are tearing everything down..this leaves me sad, felling like I've set myself up to fail. And failing is something I struggle with. I can't handle that NOT good enough feeling.

Anyways, I know I will do it! I know I can! I just don't want everyone to have to wait for the lone Fat girl walking in last.
Lesson learned though, next time around, I am going to sign up for a race that has both a 1/2 marathon and a full, that way i have like 8 hours to go 13.1 miles!! Much better plan.

Light the Night

Yes, I've become the worst Blogger! It hasn't been intentional. Honest. I've been busy with work, the kids, and trying to get all my walking in. Plus, the new TV season is on. This has left me with No Blogging time.

Anyways, last night, we walked as a family (plus our babysitter and husband) in the Light The Night walk. As a family, we walked, with 2 gold balloons (one for Griffin, one my mom) and two red balloons. We walked 2 miles, Sydney ran pretty much the whole way,except when she was jumping ofer the crack in the street or walking backwards. It was a great night. In less than two weeks I walk alone, my 13.1 miles for my mom and Griffin! (Okay, not literally alone, it's the Dallas 1/2 marathon, i'm sure there will be tons of people.) I had been training with my friend, who was walking with me, but she backed out :( Luckily, I still have my coach, mentor, and fellow teammates.

I'm excited and nervous. Can I make it? My coach tells me not to worry, that I'll be fine, I've been training. I remember when 3 miles was hard, now I consistanly walk 8! Yep, me! Walking 8 miles. But 13.1 is far. I've looked at the course and it's intimidating! I can do it! (right?)